Saturday, March 26, 2011

A Blessing, NOT A Curse.

If any of you (althought I doubt it) have been following my blog previously, you would know that I have a slight problem with my nose, and as a consequence have gone through half of my life relatively smell-less.

I don't complain though - especially when I walk past huge drains and rivers and when I am in crowded places. I don't mind that I can't smell my food; I can still taste it so that's OK for me.

I especially appreciate my so-called lackingness (or you could call it my luck) when a patient with infected wound comes to the operation theater for a wound debridement. Everyone around me would complaint about the smell. The foul smell can sometimes be smelt up to the other end of the OT, and some say that the smell sticks to your clothes that unless you change you clothes, you can't get rid of the smell. Someone would run out of the OT to get some perfumed spray. All the other doors will be closed. People will be walking out of the OT trying to put as much distance from the smell as they can. Me, I can just stand there and not react - because to me, there is nothing to react to.

But then, recently, my ENT doctor decided to start me on some (let's call it) miracle pills.I've just been taking it for the past few days and now I can smell. And you know what is one of the first things I smell? A patient's bad breath.

I just don't get it. Can't you brush your teeth if you are sick? I mean I totally understand if you are dying or things like that; but if you are just admitted for an infected eye, for appendicitis or any other minor stuff, can't you just walk to the toilet to brust your teeth? If you can walk to take a leak, I'm sure carrying a toothbrush with you won't be a problem. And can you just have a shower while you are at it? So many people complain about the so-called hospital smell - but can't you see, it's not the hospital that smells, it's the patients who refuse to just practice a little hygiene!!

Please!! Brush you teeth. Especially if you are coming to the OT. It's a closed area with nowhere to escape to. Please be considerate!!

Yes, I can also now smell my shampoo and lotion and food and everything else there is to smell, but then again my thought keeps going back to that moment when the lady opened her mouth the other day. ARGH!!!!

I wish I can write longer, but my brain has just stopped working 'cos I just remembered that I am oncall tomorrow.

Draw up your own conclusions please, can't seem to put my thought to words right now. :)

Good night!!

Wednesday, March 23, 2011


I think I am high.
I don't know why.
It's not that I have a specific reason to be happy today.
It has so far been just another day.
Yes, some good news here and there, but it doesn't really affect me, so why am I high?
Is it cheese overdose (had cheese baked rice earlier)?

But the problem is not in feeling high now; it's what is going to make this euphoria go away?
So far, I have had a few things that happened in my life that has made me feel this way.
Let me give you a few examples.

The first time I did an appendicectomy.
OK, FINE! I didn't do it myself, but I stood where the surgeon was supposed to be standing and I cut the skin and in between I did some stuff (and my MO did a lot of important stuff like finding the appendix and suturing it properly) and at the end I sutured the skin.
By the way, let me assure you, that would be the last appendicectomy I would be doing because there is NO WAY I am going to do surgical.
Anyway, after that appendicectomy, I really felt happy - not because I thought I had what it takes to be a's because my MO trusted me enough to had me the scalpel - and honestly, it felt good.
But the feeling didn't really last that long.
The next morning, something someone said, just a few sentence, took away all the happy feelings. And then, I just felt miserable..and trust me, it's a long way down when you go from euphoria to depression.

Not too long after that, I entered anaest...and I had my first 'high' when I got my first spinal - which lasted until I failed my next spinal.
Thereafter there was a 'high' when I did my first epidural which then went away when (I'm sure you can guess it) I failed my next epidural.

So you see, everytime there is euphoria, one can expect something to bring that feeling to an end.
And now I wonder how my current 'high' is going to end.
I hope it has nothing got to do with my oncall tomorrow.
I hope it has nothing got to do with my life in general.
Let's just hope this feeling goes away by the time I wake up tomorrow just so that I can be relieved (does that make sense at all?).

But then again, shit happens all the time.
We just have to live with it.

I have to stop crapping now...have to do my taxes or KR is going to 'scold' me. Life can be so hard sometimes...:P

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Don't Need These Feelings

It's been a long time.

I actually thought of just closing the whole blog down..I used to like writing because I can blurt whatever I want and complaint without bothering what other people might think. Then I stopped because there are people who might read the blog who might not like what I write - by people I mean my friends and colleagues and relatives and whomever I know.

Now, I just don't care.
Read if you want to read.
If you don't like what I say, I DON'T GIVE A DAMN CARE!!!!

Cos, you know what, looks like there are many people out there who just don't care if what they do hurts other people or not. People who don't realize that words and actions have consequences. One wrong move and you can be downgraded from an 'OK friend' to 'someone whom I will never be able to forgive because of what they did'. And in the past few months, I have done quite a number of downgrading. It's OK if you never liked the person from the start, but then it kind of gets to you when you thought you can trust the person and then they let you down like that.

There is this one person who did something to me that made me feel really, really bad - and trust me on this one, I have NEVER EVER done anything bad to this person, mainly because I am not even close to this person. I tried to come up with reasons why he/she did the thing to me but couldn't come up with any acceptable excuse. And since then, whenever I hear this person's name, all I can think is what he/she has done to me and I feel such resentment. But after that, this same person did something really, really nice for someone I am close to and I really feel very grateful to that person. But you know what, the initial resentment I felt, I still couldn't surpress it, no matter how hard I tried. I honestly want to forget the whole thing, but I just can't!!

Another thing that I wanted to get out of my chest.
Recently, I saw in Facebook that it is one of my 'friends' birthday. I am not close to her, we have more of a hi-bye relationship - but I thought, "it's her birthday, why not just wish her".
I went to her page, but found that I couldn't view her wall.
I honestly don't know what her problem is. If you think letting me view your wall is invading your privacy, then just delete me from your facebook friend's list. I really, really, REALLY DON'T CARE!!!!!!!!!
And that goes for everyone else in Facebook - rather that blocking me from your NOT AT ALL PRIVATE wall, just delete me from your list.


Monday, October 25, 2010

Is It Just Me?

I think it is really hard for someone who works in the hospital to not be paranoid.

It seems like everything and anything can go wrong.
If you think the newspaper is scary, you should try sitting in the A+E for a day and see the cases that come in.

Once a guy was admitted because the grass-cutter's blade disloged from the grass cutter and hit him right at the neck cutting some major vessels.

An accident at the pisang goreng stall and two people were badly burnt after the hot oil spilt on them.

You think keeping pets are safe? A kid came once after being bitten by her cat (can't blame the cat though - she pulled it's tail).

Many come with spine fractures after falling off trees.
Almost everyday you see people coming in with fractures after a motorbike accident.
Some come with hip fractures after a fall at home.
I saw a couple of young boys who had radius/ulna fractures after falling down while playing football.

Pregnancy - even worse!! Most people would say it is a normal, physiological thing, nothing is supposed to go wrong. But think of how many things can go wrong during the pregancy, during delivery and also post-delivery! Pregnancy can be complicated by diabetes and hypertension (even in those who previously have no co-morbids). Many have anemia. Some have low lying placenta. Normal delivery and Caesarean section are both equally scary when you think of all the problems that can arise. Very, very rarely, there are even cases of maternal deaths!!

At work, you see so many lives changing in a matter of seconds.
One accident - and some lose a limb or get paralysed for life.
A headache which turned out to be a bleed in the brain - sometimes affecting even young people.
A fall which caused a spinal injury.

Hence, I think it is justified for us to be paranoid, to worry about everything.
When I see someone cutting grass, I go out of my way just to avoid them.
If I get headaches frequently, I wonder if I should go for a CT brain.
Someone complaints of constipation - maybe it is colon cancer?
I see motorbike riders and try to stay far away from them - they are so vulnerable!!
I think about the times when we used to climb up the rambutan tree at our house and thank my luck for not falling and breaking my neck.
Pregnancy, I don't want to even think about!

Life is scary, huh!

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Life Is Good

Relief - that is what I feel. At least for now. My presentation is over and now I can relax...until it is time to study for my assessment which is next month. The only problem is, next month is not really that far away, and I have a couple of 'events' coming up so I guess time is not really on my side.

But then again, I don't think more time will make much of a difference. The more time one has (or at least I have) the more one procrastinates, right?

Life has been good recently. I have been enjoying myself in Anaesth. It is not just that the working hours are shorter, but I actually enjoy myself at work. I don't dread going to work like when I was in....let's just say another department. I don't have to review patients or take blood from a patient millions of times or set branulas that keep on 'bunking' and I don't have to put up with crap from other people around me. Almost all the MOs are very friendly, and even the specialist too.

Here is what I go through everyday - go to work, prepare drugs and then the patient comes in for op. Put the patient under and just monitor the patient till the op is over and then reverse the patient and send him or her out. I don't have to see the patient's family and answer questions (the worst part is when a patient has 10 relatives who all insist on approaching you one a time to as the same question). I don't have to review the patient (I know I've told that already - goes on to show how much I really hate reviewing patients). I don't have to do discharges. I don't have to do many other mundane ward work.

Life is good.

Although I do get irritated with some patients - chronic pain patients. They come under anaesthesiology as well and I was posted in the Acute Pain Service for 2 weeks and had to see these patients in the clinic. They come to the clinic and complain of pain everywhere. Some are genuine, but most of them...I don't know. Maybe their pain is real, or maybe it is just psychological. But then when a patient says that her headache gets better when she takes her gastritis pill, don't you think something is wrong? And if someone tells you they play the piano for 14 hours each day and does 3600 repetition of some exercise in the gym - would you believe them? How about a husband who complaints of pain but is allergic to all the painkillers in the world whose wife is also a pain clinic patient and is ALSO allergic to all the painkillers in the world? The best part - their child is SO allergic to prawn that she develops some allergic reaction if their neighbour cooks prawn and they can smeel it. *Sigh* To believe or not to believe...

Anyway, there is no real purpose for this post. It's just that I think I have been ignoring my blog for so long..probably because I am having long dinners and by the time I come back I am too lazy to write and the people to blame are my dinner buddies...typical human - always put the blame on someone else.

I will try my best though, to write more often....if I can think of things to write. :)

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Mercedes Benz- Malaysian made?

Spotted in Ipoh recently..

Monday, September 13, 2010

10 minute presentation

I am supposed to do a presentation on Fink's hypoxia - something I have never even heard of before.

Usually, when I don't know something, I rely on Wikipedia to help me understand it first before reading other websites for more info.

But, all Wiki had to say about this topic was this :
The Fink effect, also known as "diffusion anoxia", "diffusion hypoxia",or the "third gas effect", is a factor that influences the Po2 (oxygen saturation) of alveolar gas. When soluble gases are breathed in (e.g. nitrous oxide, N2O) large quantities can be dissolved in body fluids rapidly. This can lead to a temporary increase in the concentration of oxygen and carbon dioxide in the alveolus, causing an increase in their respective partial pressures.

The effect is named for
Bernard Raymond Fink (1914–2000), whose 1955 paper first explained it. When a patient is recovering from N2O anaesthesia, large quantities of this gas cross from the blood into the alveolus (down its concentration gradient) and so for a short period of time, the O2 and CO2 in the alveolus are diluted by this gas. This could potentially cause the partial pressure of oxygen to decrease and could temporarily lead to hypoxia. The decrease in CO2 could also potentiate this effect as ventilation would be suppressed, leading to potential hypoxaemia. Nonetheless, this effect would only last a couple of minutes and hypoxia can be avoided by increasing the fractional inspired oxygen concentration when recovering from N2O anaesthesia.

I don't understand what Wiki is trying to say and other websites don't have much info as well.

How am I going to do my presentation?

How slow would I have to read what Wiki said in order to stretch the presentation to 10 minutes?